What To Do If You Need A Social Media Detox But Can’t Quit
Social media detox is ever so popular but not everybody has the “luxury” to do it.
Do you remember the days when social media didn’t exist? Those were some good old memories I’d like to cherish forever. They still give me bittersweet feelings thinking about how I used to spend my time getting dirty playing with sand outdoors, or how I’d get a scrape from falling off my bike while riding around the neighborhood.
From Friendster and MySpace to Facebook and Instagram, the world of social media has evolved so much. There’s no denying that social media brought many benefits to our lives — building and maintaining relationships, uncovering industry trends in real-time, educating oneself, business marketing strategy, promoting noble causes, increasing awareness, and more. However, it’s not always fine and dainty. As much as social media has enriched our lives, it has also created a lot of chaos. Cyberbullying, hacking, frauds, and cheating and relationship issues are a few note-worthy toxicities of social media.
Enter: social media detox. Despite the increase in the number of people joining social media every day, there’s also a significant number of users abandoning social media. For some, having absolutely no access to social media sounds like a hellish punishment. For others, it’s like a blessing in disguise as an effective way to improve their health and wellbeing. But what if you’re stuck between these two extremes?
Sounds impossible?
Well, here’s my story.
I, like many of my peers, first discovered the world of social media when I was 13. It was the booming era of Friendster and MySpace. With almost every single one of my friends signed up on those platforms, I naturally jumped onto the bandwagon as well. It was fun, no doubt. The excitement of coming home from school just to log on to Friendster to connect with my friends online is a feeling I’ll never forget. But while I was enjoying the fun of social media, who would’ve thought that it’ll become such a huge part of my life in the later years to come?
Fast forward to 10 years later. Social media is still part of my life, of course. A very huge part, in fact. It’s something I deal with every single day for at least 5 hours because it’s my job. Sounds fun, huh? Being able to play with social media during working hours.
Not. At. All.
My daily work routine starts with me loading the webpage to Facebook and Twitter on my work computer while I check on my company’s Instagram page on my phone. For the rest of the day, the tabs for Facebook and Twitter are constantly kept in view, and there are times when I’d spend 30 mins on Instagram just to edit some Stories. It’s a norm to see my teammates scrolling social media during working hours — it’s definitely nothing to raise alarm about to the HOD or HR since it’s part of the job.
Whenever I share with my friends and families about what I do for a living, they’d always say I have one of the most interesting and relaxing jobs in the world. Sorry, but I beg to differ.
As time goes by, the toxicity of social media started growing on me. I stopped finding joy in using social media and instead, loathed it so much. So much so that I wanted to just go cold turkey and cut myself out from the world of internet. Yes, the toxicity spread beyond social media itself. At some point, I dreamt of going off the beaten track to somewhere with no internet access at all and live a simple life as a fruit farmer or some sort.
But with social media management as my bread and butter, there was absolutely no way I could cut it out of my life.
People leave social media for various reasons. Some find it a waste of time, some had bad experiences, and some are worried about their privacy.
For me, I wanted out after a traumatic experience that crossed the limit of what I could handle mentally. In summary, I was traumatized to use social media after a hellish situation-ship that left me feeling uncomfortable (and I’d often get panic attacks) whenever I see anything associating with Facebook.
Sounds ridiculous, right? Not if you truly understand how mental health works (I’ll come to that topic the next time). Since then, getting my job done was 100 times harder than how it was previously. I quit using my personal social media (Facebook, Twitter & Instagram) but had no way to quit them all due to my work. That feeling of being in limbo, having a foot in and out of social media, was like going back and forth between heaven and hell — one day I’m feeling fine and the next day I’m triggered so badly that I failed to contain my emotions.
Many people told me to change the way I view social media and learn to stop associating it with all my bad experiences. Yes, I agree it is a good way to find balance again. But here’s the thing many people fail to notice: It’s not a one-day achievement. I can’t simply snap a finger and instantly have a healthy relationship with social media. If we could do that, the world would be a much happier place to live in.
Despite the limited options I had, I tried to make the most out of everything I could do. I gave myself time off social media every day after 9pm. This allows me to complete my work and keep myself updated with the latest social media trends but at the same time, gives my mind some peaceful time before I head to bed. Since I rarely work on weekends, I dedicate either Saturday or Sunday as my off-day from social media. That means absolutely no social media at all on that day.
It’s not easy at all. Despite my trauma, I had an urgency to check my social media during the early stages of practicing the detox. It’s like knowing that a stab wound would hurt a lot if you touch it but yet you can’t resist the urge to touch it. From turning off my phone notification to deleting social media apps on my phone, I was running back and forth between various methods to try to keep myself away from social media.
There’s a saying that it takes approximately 22 days to form a habit and an average of 66 days to create a lifestyle.
Previously, I had the habit of scrolling through all my social media apps the moment after I wake up. I would do so for 20–30 mins before getting out of bed to start my day. So when I was determined to cut social media out as much as possible from my life, I replaced those social media apps with the news. I had BBC, Sky News, CBC, The Globe, Apple News, and Stuff.co.nz downloaded on my phone so that I could keep myself occupied with current affairs.
Naturally, there was a strong resistance within me that would try to persuade me to click into the social media apps but I fought hard. I put up a fight with myself every day and tried my best to stick to my new routine. Eventually, it became a habit and now, it just feels natural and right to read the latest world news the first thing in the morning.
No, I don’t have the “luxury” to quit social media and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to. But when there’s a will, there’s a way. Whether you’re in the same position as me or simply can’t bring yourself to quit social media altogether, start by taking baby steps and make do of all the options you have to transform your life.
The options are there. You just have to choose it.
