Sign in

Former magazine writer, current social media analyst, future SWE. Talk to me about mental health, science, technology, medicine, lifestyle, women and more

Nobody said it was gonna be an easy ride.

Photo: Priscilla Du Preez/Unsplash

Does everybody have their shit together, or are they simply skilled at hiding their pain and struggles?

According to LinkedIn research, quarter-life crises can start from around 25 and last until our early 30s. I turned 25 in February, which means it’s been 6 months since I’ve been trying to ride the dragon. But frankly, I felt that quarter-life crises had crept up on me way earlier.

I used to think I had my shit together when I landed my dream job as a journalist in a locally renowned magazine-publishing company straight after graduation. My experience in the magazine industry…

It’s more than just getting paid to scroll through social media.

The most common statement I get whenever I tell someone I’m a social media manager is “You get paid to scroll Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. That’s so cool!”. Darling, that’s not really what the job entails. While scrolling through social media platforms is something I have to do on a daily basis, it actually make up only around 10% of my job responsibilities. The other 90% are the things nobody tell you.

Social media managers’ job scope varies according to the nature of the company. Some companies may have a huge social media team made up of multiple social media…

The crippling relationship with food is messing me up.

A year ago when the world went into strict lockdown, I wrote about how self-isolation triggered my binge eating disorder. A year later, I’m sitting across a pile of empty biscuits and chips packets writing about my struggle with bulimia.

2020–2021 hasn’t been easy for anyone. Even if you think self-isolation is a perfect gift for an introvert/indoor person like yourself, your body will still struggle. It’ll feel pain, either physically or mentally, and eventually shut up and make you feel like there’s an empty hole in you.

I started binge eating in the final year of my university, thanks…

Taking myself out for meals has helped me improve my relationship with myself.

At 17, I dwelled over the fact that I always had no friends to visit new cafes in town. At 19, I dined alone at a cafe and my anxiety went through the roof. At 25, I’d take time off work on purpose so that I could dine solo at any cafes I want.

The idea of eating alone sounds terrifying to many people. Trust me, I was one of those people previously. Everything changed after I’d pushed myself out of my comfort zone and dined solo at a restaurant for some solitude. The experience opened a whole new world…

A true story of how I almost lost myself writing for money.

I wish I can turn back the time and tell myself to stop stressing about money. But the cold, harsh truth is that I can never stop stressing about money. Not a year ago, not now, and probably not in the next five years.

Sometimes I wonder why my mental health is crippling so much as I age. Then, I remember that’s because I’m now responsible for every aspect of my life. When I was younger, all I had to worry about was getting good grades and completing all my homework. I never had to worry about money, relationships, health…

Feeling depressed? See a therapist. Struggling with traumas? See a therapist. Everybody knows to advise someone who’s struggling with mental health issues to see a professional. Yet, nobody ever considered about the cost.

“I think you should see a therapist.”

I’ve heard this sentence countless times. I admit I’m not at the pink of mental health. I’ve been living a rather (what I like to describe) hellish life ever since a heartbreak a year ago. Ya ya, a heartbreak is no big deal, but I’m not here for you to invalidate my pain and feelings. I’ve had a fair share of heartbreaks in life but this last one hit hard. Hard, as in, I-couldn’t-live-a-normal-life-anymore hard. Difficult, as in, I-had-to-change-my-name-because-I-was-traumatised-by-my-own-name difficult.

So I really don’t give a damn if you roll your eyes and…

How I came to the realisation that my actions and feelings of compassion, empathy and kindness turned out to be a mask of a bigger inner issue.

Without self love, we are essentially an empty shell waiting for hopes and miracles to fill us. But let’s not forget, empty spaces can also be filled with pain and struggles.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately. Not that I don’t already think a lot on a daily basis but this round of overthinking is giving me quite a number of epiphanies.

I was decluttering my room a while ago when I came across an item that reminded me of someone I’d connected with on a dating app. At that time, I figured I was ready to move on from…

There, I said it.

You’ve probably heard of this phrase at least once in your life. You’d just broken up with your partner whom you thought was “the one”. You’d painted a “happily ever after” scenario of the both of you growing old together and enjoying life so when the breakup happened, the wound hurt like you’ve been stabbed by a dagger a million times. After processing what’d happened, you leaned to your friends for strength and support. And in the midst of comforting you, they said:

“It’s okay, time will heal everything.”

Here’s the harsh truth: No, it doesn’t.

Photo by Murray Campbell on Unsplash

It’s been a little…

Have you ever had your heart broken only for someone to say, “It’s okay, just forget about it and move on.”?

At some point in life, we’ve all been told that forgiving and forgetting can empower us to be a better person and live a better life. Yet since a young age, that advice has always disgusted me. Imagine hearing teachers telling students to forgive their classmate for bullying them because their bully lacks parental love — that’s not being a bigger person. That’s disrespecting yourself. Same goes when your ex cheats or takes advantage of you.

When a man I love did something despicable and broke my heart [I shall refer this as “the incident” in the whole article], I…

As industry experts fight against time to put a full stop to the Covid-19 pandemic, the role of technology has grown rapidly in the past couple of months as society adapts to the new normal.

In Malaysia, the MySejahtera mobile application was launched to assist the government in managing the pandemic outbreaks nationwide. It was developed under a strategic cooperation between five federal agencies — the Ministry of Health (MOH), the National Security Council (NSC), the Ministry of Science, Technology and Innovation (MOSTI), MAMPU and MCMC — and is available on the Google Play Store, App Store and Huawei AppGallery, with iOS 12 and Android 4.4 being the minimum requirement each device should have.

Photo by Tonik on Unsplash

With over 15.1 million registered users as of 16 August 2020, the app offers a quicker and more convenient way for…


Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store